


Frostbitten Thoughts

by Ryn_Holt



Series: Empty Graves [2]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Other, Reader dealing with almost dying twice, dealing with Molly's death, spoilers if your not up done with 115 yet, yes this is short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-17
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:48:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27600241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ryn_Holt/pseuds/Ryn_Holt
Summary: As you lay in your short rest in the frozen ruins, you think about what you've lost and what you have left to lose.
Relationships: Mollymauk Tealeaf/Reader, The Mighty Nein and Reader
Series: Empty Graves [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2017789
Comments: 3
Kudos: 20





	Frostbitten Thoughts

You stared up and up at what was now a ceiling getting the occasional shaving of ice to fall on your face. While Jester and the others set about busy with some tasks, you had decided to rest laying down on the ice. Your hands were no long numb but burning as if they had been stuck in fire, rather than encased in ice. 

You were, in a word, fucked. You turned your head, to watch eagle Jester carving threw the ice, seeming content in her work. Well, not completely, you had been in worse situations and survived. 

You rubbed at your wrists as they also started to burn, survival but at a cost. You’d seen how close Caduceus came to falling, to dying in this frozen hellscape. Tears rose and you fought them with even measured breaths. How close to loosing another friend. 

These were one of the rare moments you almost regretted your lifestyle. They were few and far between. You didn’t have much growing up, and so the rough and tumble life you had now wasn’t that different. But now tattered and freezing, friends in various states of disheveled and hurt, part of you wished you had chosen something more sedate. 

If the pain you were in was worth anything, if was worth the catharsis of your feelings of Molly. 

You’d loved Molly. You loved and ached and yearned. But he was gone. 

You’d held out hope longer than the others. You thanked the Moon Weaver and whatever or whoever had a hand in it. You imagined what the first conversation with him was going to be like. For him to see Veth as her true self, to meet Caduceus, to see how Caleb and Fjord and Beau had grown, to hug Yasha, to see her wings. You wanted to show him how you’d changed too, how confident you had become. You wanted to hear him talk, to hear his laugh. 

And then, Jester’s face fell as she scried on him. You listened as she told everyone what had happened. It didn’t sound like Molly, well according to Jester he still sounded like himself but still different in a way, sharper, dangerous. 

You wanted to believe that he knew what he was doing, that there was a great plan just waiting to be seen. You didn’t want to believe he could do evil. 

Then you found Vess Derogna, dried blood and all. You didn’t mourn for her. You found her to be a bully, and who mourns bullies? But, the pain she must have gone through before death was a release, you shuddered to think about it. You should have seen it then, that there was no trace left. Still you hoped. You thought about what Caleb’s mentor had done to him. Maybe she’d wronged Molly in a similar way, you wouldn’t be surprised if she had. 

But the bodies, the bodies that were piled everywhere. Again and again. It was a trail, a red string from place to place. Everyone of them cut down as if they were sacrifices to a Betrayer God. No mercy, no kindness, no justice. 

And maybe just maybe despite all of that you still cared, just a little, enough to hate yourself for it. 

Then you saw Caduceus’s life being sucked from him, and that little hope burned away. You fought with renewed anger not often seen when you battled. You didn’t even have time to say much before being scooped up to fight and save Veth. 

Two almost dead. All to chase a memory. When you had collapsed on the ground, shaking from pain and exhaustion, you realized that you didn’t care about if it was Molly or not. You had spent too long focusing on what you might have rather than what you do have. You weren’t going to let that go, you weren’t going to loose anyone else just on the off chance of seeing Molly again. You held no mercy for the person who wore your friends face. 

When you were done resting, Beau helped you up and thanked her making a joke about making some sort of flaming drink tonight if Caleb was willing to help.

It wasn’t very funny but Beau and Jester laughed at it and it made you feel a little warmer at least. 

You chose the Mighty Nein, you told yourself. Today and forever. 

But then too quickly, you found more bodies, and a door. And when you opened the door Caleb’s items strewn on the ground. 

You saw him. Through the screams and the blood, through the chaos, you saw him. 

He killed the woman in front of him like it was nothing and you couldn’t move. You stood frozen watching it not focused on the one dying but the one who was killing. 

Nine points of red light, lighting up like something from a dream forgotten except in your deepest nightmares. Those moments you could still feel the hate that you had so newly held. 

And then he saw you. And he smiled. 

And it wasn’t Molly. But it looked, and it sounded and it moved like Molly. 

As he spoke it hit you. You were going to have to watch the one you loved the most die again, and this time it was going by your own hand.

**Author's Note:**

> Who's ready to get their heart broken by the next episode?  
> Because it's sure as hell not me.


End file.
